Thursday, December 15, 2011

New Year's Resolutions

If I had a nickel for every time I said I was going to start diet, I swear I'd be rich. You’ll actually notice a few of my earlier posts where I talk about my millionth attempt to drop a few pounds. As much as I hate to admit it, the truth of the matter is that I've struggled with my weight ever since I was about 10 years-old. I’ve never been extremely overweight; at my all-time high I weighed 180 pounds (I was only 5' 4" at the time so I was pretty heavy). Sadly, this was when I was about 13-yeards-old. It wasn’t until my freshman year of high school that I finally decided to do something. I started playing sports and became more conscientious of what I ate. I was able to lose 40 pounds but all of that came at a price. I then became obsessive, weighing myself almost every single day up to 2 to 3 times a day. If I even gained 1 pound, I would get so down on myself that I promised I would lose 2 the next. Over the years it's been a constant struggle. I eventually learned that this wasn't healthy, and finally began to accept my body. I've become a little less stringent, weighing myself now about once a week. I’ve found joy in exercise, no longer seeing it as a weight loss method but more just something I do for fun. Yes, running is fun to me!

As much as I love to be active, I admit that my eating habits aren't always the best. I don't know what it is about me, but the minute you put something sweet in front of me I'll either resist the temptation or fall right off the deep end and eat way more than I should. I’m the all-in or all out type of person which has caused nothing but a series of weight fluctuations over the years ranging between 10 and 15 pounds. Again, not health either.

Before the chubiness kicked in.
Sorry, but I dare not share photos of my teenage years.

To this day, there’s still that little chubby girl inside of me that stresses out. I don’t consider myself overweight, but I know I could definitely afford to lose a good 10 pounds. Some friends say I'm too hard on myself, but I guess it's because I know I have the potential to do better. If I followed my runs with consistent healthy eating or treating myself to something sweet in moderation, I know I would feel so much better.

As we approach the New Year, many of us will resolve to eat healthier, workout more, or lose a few pounds. Last year, I resolved to quit smoking which went over very well. Yay for me! Well this year, I started mine a bit early. As of last Saturday a few friends and I decided to challenge each other on a little weight loss competition. I'm not looking to drop a lot of weight. We’re actually basing the winner off of percentage so my 10 or 15 pounds that I hope to lose will get me a fairly good number overall.

My motivation and outlook this time are different. For starters, the boyfriend has agreed to participate in the competition. I've mentioned in a previous post how we both felt like we've gained a little since we started dating almost three years ago. Another huge motivator for me is my half Ironman next year. Triathlon gear is just not attractive! Let me just say, for anyone who has done a tri, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Triathlon gear is usually very tightfitting and when you're out there on the course (especially since my event is right in the middle of summer), you want to wear the least amount of clothing as possible and still be comfortable. I don't mean that you want to go out on the course practically naked, but you want to avoid having to switch clothing or layer up on top of what you're already wearing during the transition.

Let me just say again, if I had a nickel for every time I said this. So here's to the New Year and starting it off right! What are your resolutions for 2012?


  1. Great post! Love honesty.

    I'm the same way in terms of fluctuating with my weight. Really, the only way i can look halfway decent is to run 40-plus miles a week. It's so stinking hard to be disciplined, you know? And I'm the same way with either being really good and avoiding the bad stuff or just diving in head first. Sigh.

    I'm writing something up on resolutions that will be out just before the 1st, so you'll have to read that for my own thoughts on resolutions, but I think that one will be to continue running every day, another will probably be not just with weight but rather to stick to either a calorie count or eating a five meals a day like I used to. I probably won't make more than three just to make sure I can actually stick to em :)

  2. Thanks for the support! I know you've come a long way yourself. I can't wait to hear about your resolutions. Your posts are always so inspiring!

  3. It is hard to admit your weight flaws. I know I have them too! Good for you on this. I have decided that in order for me to loose the weight that I want I will not commit to a diet or even tell people that I am on one because when I have that one bad meal or few extra sweets I don't want to feel the guilt. I try to keep it all in moderation. Holidays are hard but I am sticking with it! :) Good luck on yours :)

  4. Thanks April! I understand your hesitation in not wanting to tell people. Trust's even harder to admit on a blog. I've talked about wanting to lose weight so many times. I'm the girl who says, "Starting Monday..." every other Friday. I have such a hard time being consistent. I'll be sure to keep you all posted. I think having a space for accountability (hopefully) keeps me on track. :) Happy Holidays!